White Knight, White Light
by xanfan
Summary: AU SLASH Xander means more to the Scoobys than they could possible imagine, and when something happens to him, chaos ensues. Crossover in later chapters. XA established. This Story is Complete
1. Prolog

Title: **White Knight, White Light, Prolog– In The Arms Of An Angel**

Author: Xanfan

Rating: R/NC-17 for violence

Pairing: Xander/Angel

Summary: Xander means more to the Scoobys than they could possible imagine, and when something happens to him, chaos ensues

Spoilers: Anything in Ats & BtVS is up for grabs, but I have messed with the timeline a bit.

Warnings: CHARCTER DEATH and Violence and slash.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Words in _Italics_ indicate thoughts.

Angel held his boy in his arms, the young man's blood pumped slowly out of his body, through holes left by the spines from the tail of an Eparkluth demon. One swipe had impaled him with the razor sharp spines, going all the way through his body, even more damage had been done when the demon had pulled back his tail, removing the spines from Xander's body.

Angel had looked over at the boy's scream; Xander had still been standing, looking stunned. The boy had looked down and reached a hand down, to touch one of the open wounds on his torso, staring numbly at the blood covering his hand, when he pulled it away. In almost slow motion, he had dropped to his knees; Angel's vampiric speed had allowed him to catch the boy before the rest of him hit the ground.

Angel didn't hear the girls screaming in the background, didn't see Spike rip the demon's head from its body in pure fury, and didn't hear Giles trying to comfort the girls, while manfully holding back his sobs.

He heard and saw nothing but his boy, cradle in his arms, a liquid popping sound coming from his lungs every time he tried to breath. Didn't feel his own face change when the demon came forward. Felt only the boy's fingers, as they reached up to his face, tracing the brow ridges lovingly and caressing a fang with the tips of his fingers.

Didn't want to hear the words Xander could barely get out, "You're not planning on using those are you?" Xander tried to tease.

"I could, if it would keep you here, with me, I would."

"Angel, baby, we talked about this, it wouldn't really be me, would it?" Xander replied.

"Willow could give you your soul and…."

"Hush, my Angel, you want me to be constantly battling my demon, like you do yours? Want me to feel guilty for the thoughts it has? You don't really want that, you told me so." Xander's hand had moved to cup Angel's cheek.

"When I said that, when I promised that I wouldn't turn you, I thought we would have more time together, years, decades, me and you. We haven't had enough time, not nearly enough time." Angel had tears running down his cheeks.

"A lifetime wouldn't be enough time to spend with you, eternity wouldn't be enough time." Xander replied, as his hand fell from Angel's face; his body no longer had the energy for that simple gesture. "I love you, you know that. More than anything or anyone, I love you, my Angel. Remember that."

The last breath left Xander's body, his heart no longer pumping.

A primal roar filled the air, soon accompanied by another, and screams of emotional agony and grief.

Demons and beasts for miles around shuddered in terror, sure that whatever was making that sound would bring their end. And many of them were right.


	2. Chapter 1 And Evil Trembled

Title: **White Knight, White Light, Part 1 – And Evil Trembled**

Author: Xanfan

Rating: R/NC-17 for violence

Pairing: Xander/Angel

Summary: Xander means more to the Scoobys than they could possible imagine, and when something happens to him, chaos ensues

Spoilers: Anything in Ats & BtVS is up for grabs, but I have messed with the timeline a bit.

Warnings: CHARCTER DEATH and Violence and slash.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Words in _Italics_ indicate thoughts.

Last Time:

The last breath left Xander's body, his heart no longer pumping.

A primal roar filled the air, soon accompanied by another, and screams of emotional agony and grief.

Demons and beasts for miles around shuddered in terror, sure that whatever was making that sound would bring their end. And many of them were right.

Angel held Xander's body in his arms, refusing to let go. Shrugging off words of a coroner and hospital, he stood, with his boy held tight against him and made his way to the mansion. He took his boy up to the room they used when they were in town. Angel gently laid his love's body on the bed and climbed in next to him, curling around the cooling body.

The other's followed Angel back to the mansion, watched him climb the stairs to their room. They were silent, except for the weeping, as he cuddled next to the body of the boy who had been his entire world.

Fred, Dawn and Lorne were elected to stay and watch over Angel, to make sure he didn't do anything drastic.

The others, being two ex-watchers, two slayers, an ex-vengeance demon, a street-fighter, a seer, a vampire and two seriously brassed off witches, went into the night, intent on causing destruction to the monsters that inhabited the darkness. And they did.

They found several nests of vampires and various demons. They left nothing behind.

Giles stopped trying to be the strong father figure/emotional rock and let Ripper out. And Ripper was just as enraged and devastated as Giles. Xander had been his son in every way but blood. So, blood would flow tonight, to make up for it. His battle ax hacked through the evil he faced, leaving ruin in its wake.

Wesley stopped being the responsible, sensitive one and became the rogue demon hunter he once claimed to be. He embraced the loyalty and love Xander had always shown his friends, and channeled it into fury. Many demons fell that night to a man they would have overlooked, mere hours before.

Buffy and Faith cut down anything that stepped in their path. They had both been loved and befriended by a boy who had gotten little but pain and ridicule back, their regret over their own unthinking behavior towards Xander, turned to wrath. No weapons were needed, as heads were ripped off and hearts were ripped out. Two pretty surefire ways to kill most anything. They expressed their intense grief and rage in the violence, reveling in it, taking comfort from it.

Anya's confusion and bewilderment at the loss of her ex-boyfriend, the first friend she had ever had, was set aside, as she embraced the rage that the other's felt. She had tormented and tortured men for over eleven-hundred years; she used every bit of that knowledge to good use. Not many things that had been considered male before that night, would have been seen as such, afterwards.

Luckily, for them, they were killed before the true horror of their "personal" loss could be realized. Because, as Anya aimed for the "manhood", Gunn followed her, aiming for the head or heart, venting his anger while ending their suffering at the same time. He was as angered and saddened at the loss of his close friend as the rest, but some thing's, a man just didn't want to see.

Cordelia used all her anger at the loss of the first person to ever really love her, and every ounce of training Angel had given her, to decimate whatever dared challenge her. Oh, and the sword he had also given her, helped too.

And Spike, he reveled in the violence he perpetrated that night. Loved every ripped out throat and every torn off limb. He had seriously hoped it would assuage the grief he felt at the loss of his friend and mate to his sire. But, even bathed in the blood of his enemy, he couldn't find relief from that distressing feeling.

Willow's grief was something so encompassing, it had to be set aside to make way for the pure rage that followed. Rage, that had any vampires or demons survived the encounter to tell the tale, would have been described as a black magical energy that manifested itself in sparks of electricity shooting from her hands and burning all it touched. Some would have said they saw her eyes and hair turn black, again, had they survived. You would think she would have been the scariest off all.

You'd think that, wouldn't you? You would be wrong.

The scariest things those demons and vampires faced that night, was Tara. It wasn't that she was enraged, she was. It wasn't that she was overcome with grief, she was. Xander had been the first to befriend her, besides Willow. They had discovered they were kindred spirits, alike in many ways, some, too painful to speak of. They were also both pure souls, despite the ugliness they had faced or had been inflicted upon them, they were goodness and light. When Xander died, that purity leaked into the world. And Tara took it back, channeling it and her own purity and white magic, into a powerful light. She glowed with this light, and after protecting Spike with a quick spell, unleashed the light on all that stood against Xander's warriors. Why protect Spike? Because demons cannot bear The Light, its purity, burning evil at its touch, at its very sight.

So yeah, for demons that night, Tara was the scariest thing they had ever seen. Because what is scarier to evil, than pure goodness?

Everything that has not been destroyed by the ire of all the other warriors, was eliminated by Tara's light. Evil ran so hard and so fast, that even The Hellmouth could not stand against the light, falling in itself, sealing the doorway forever.

Only passive demons, good demons, demons with souls, or demons protected by a badass witch, survived, that night in Sunnydale.


	3. Chapter 2 What The Hell?

Title: **White Knight, White Light, Part 2 – What The Hell?**

Author: Xanfan

Rating: R/NC-17 for violence

Pairing: Xander/Angel

Summary: Xander means more to the Scoobys than they could possible imagine, and when something happens to him, chaos ensues

Spoilers: Anything in Ats & BtVS is up for grabs, but I have messed with the timeline a bit.

Warnings: CHARCTER DEATH and Violence and slash.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Words in _Italics_ indicate thoughts.

Last Time:

So yeah, for demons that night, Tara was the scariest thing they had ever seen. Because what is scarier to evil, than pure goodness?

Everything that has not been destroyed by the ire of all the other warriors was eliminated by Tara's light. Evil ran so hard and so fast, that even The Hellmouth could not stand against the light, falling in itself, sealing the doorway forever.

Only passive demons, good demons, demons with souls, or demons protected by a badass witch, survived, that night in Sunnydale.

When the Hellomouth closed, Tara let the light go, returning all the purity and goodness that she had used, to its rightful place and into the world.

The others, who had all been knocked to their knees by the power Tara had unleashed, stood and walked to surround her, in awe of the glow she still carried.

"Not that that wasn't a pretty show Glinda, but, what the bloody hell was that?" Spike was the first to speak, voicing the questions that all of them were too shocked to ask.

"That was Xander." Tara whispered.

"Can I just say, huh?" Buffy interjected in confusion.

"Xander was nothing if not purity and goodness and love. When he died, the part of him that was all those things, leached out into the world. I just, borrowed it, used it and some of my own, to, you know, do that. Evil flees in the face of pure good, so I made it flee. I think I may have used more than I intended to." Tara admitted.

"What do you mean?" Wesley asked.

"I knew Xander's essence was powerfully good, pure. I didn't realize that it was that powerful, that pure. And mixed with mine and boosted by the white magic, I kinda, think, maybe, I may have, uhhh, closedthehellmouth." Tara ended in pure Xander babble mode.

"My God, did you just say you closed the Hellmouth?" Ripper was gone, replaced by a glasses cleaning Giles.

"I think so." Tara replied.

"That's a good thing, right?" Cordelia asked.

"I think it is. I think it's a very good thing." Wesley answered.

They all stood around looking at each other, mostly looking at Tara, in astonishment.

Willow was proud of and amazed with her girlfriend. Then, one word Tara used struck her. "You said was."

"Willow?"

"Tara, you said, 'the part of him that was all those things' Was, as in isn't anymore. He's really gone." Willow ended on a sob.

"Oh, sweetie." Tara took her girlfriend in her arms.

"Oh God, he's really gone." Buffy whispered.

They all looked at each other once more and turned to head back to the mansion.

They reached the mansion and went up to the bedroom to check on Angel.

He was still lying on the bed, holding on tightly to his boy's body.

"What the hell happened out there? We felt a big shockwave thingy and then….everything was calm." Dawn practically shouted.

"We kicked a lot of bad guy ass, then, Tara used Xander's essence to destroy leftover evil and close the Hellmouth." Faith said, succinctly.

"Oh yes, that makes everything so clear." Dawn replied sarcastically.

"Actually, that pretty much is exactly what happened." Wesley offered. "Tara channeled Xander's essence of goodness, purity and love, to destroy the evil demons and ended up closing the Hellmouth, because his essence was so strong. Then she released his essence and the white magic back into the world."

"Babycakes, Sweetcheeks, did you release the essence into the world or return it to its rightful place?" Lorne queried.

"I-I-I-I returned it, I think." Tara stuttered.

"Why do you ask?" Giles wondered.

"Because there is a difference." Lorne said.

"What difference?" Wesley asked.

"Why don't you look at the bed and find out?" Lorne answered.

They all turned as one to the bed, where Angel had sat up, pulling Xander's body into his lap. All of the sudden, little sparks of lightening enveloped Xander's body. His back arched and air filled his lungs in a huge gasp.

Xander's essence had been returned to its rightful place, in Xander.

Angel reached out to touch his boy, caressing his face hesitantly. "Xander?"

"Hey Deadboy, do I have to be called Deadboy now too?" Xander asked, as he opened his eyes.

"No baby, you're alive." Angel said in awe.

Xander was relieved to feel himself breathing and feel his heart beating.

"Angel, why am I alive?"

"I don't know, for sure. But, I can't say I'm sorry."

"Why don't you sing for Lorne, maybe he can tell us what exactly is going on?" Fred offered hesitantly.

Xander sang a couple bars of "Happy Birthday" and Lorne asked him to stop, not because it was bad, but because he already had enough.

"I don't know if you were one already or if you are one because of what happened tonight, but, you're an immortal." Lorne informed him.

"He's immortal?" Cordelia asked.

"No, he's an immortal." Lorne replied.

"What's the difference?" Buffy asked.

A figure stepped into the room, surprising them all and causing Xander to grab his head, at the buzzing that filled it.

"Maybe I can help explain. And, Xander is it? If you look me in the eyes, the buzzing will go away." The man offered.


	4. Chapter 3 Oops, My Bad

Title: **White Knight, White Light, Part 3 – Oops, My Bad.**

Author: Xanfan

Rating: R/NC-17 for violence

Pairing: Xander/Angel

Summary: Slash Xander means more to the Scoobys than they could possible imagine, and when something happens to him, chaos ensues. Crossover with Highlander.

Spoilers: Anything in Ats & BtVS is up for grabs, but I have messed with the timeline a bit.

Warnings: CHARCTER DEATH and Violence and slash.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Words in _Italics_ indicate thoughts.

Last Time:

"I don't know if you were one already, or if you are one because of what happened tonight, but, you're an immortal." Lorne informed him.

"He's immortal?" Cordelia asked.

"No, he's an immortal." Lorne replied.

"What's the difference?" Buffy asked.

A figure stepped into the room, surprising them all and causing Xander to grab his head, at the buzzing that filled it.

"Maybe I can help explain. And, Xander is it? If you look me in the eyes, the buzzing will go away." The man offered.

The room got very quiet as they stared at the man. Then, a shock of recognition hit both Spike and Angel.

"YOU!" They both shouted.

"Me." The man replied, a smirk of amusement gracing his youngish features.

"You bastard, if you think you can come in here and take Xander from Angel, like you took Dru and Darla….." Spike trailed off, as the man chuckled.

"For one, no real harm was done and you two were the ones who killed the men I sent to unchain you. For another, as nice as I'm sure Xander is, I'm not here to seduce him, I'm here to teach him to be an immortal."

"Whoa, Whoa, Whoa. Back it up here, someone want to fill me in on what the hell is going on here! And who the hell is this?" Xander shouted.

"That is The Immortal." Spike spat out, pretending to ignore the choking sounds coming from the former watchers. Apparently, the Watcher's Council had been paying very close attention to they're exploits during the whole 'Scourge of Europe' thing. "He chained Angelus and me up, kidnapped Drusilla and Darla, had his wicked way with them, and then sent two servants to let us go when he was done with the girls. We had been chained up for days, of course, we ate the poor buggers, we were starving."

The other occupants of the room turned to stare at the newcomer. He smiled, shrugged his shoulders and said, "Oops, my bad. Oh, and I go by the name Adam Pierson now. The Immortal was a bit of a heavy title to bear, although, not as bad as some other titles I've had in the past."

"What other titles did you carry?" Wesley asked curiously.

"That's not important now…." Adam began.

"Yes, that's not important now. Let's get to the important part, you know, the part where he said it took him days to exhaust out Dru and Darla," Anya said, with a predatory gleam in her eye.

Adam swallowed nervously, as both Anya and Faith began to circle him.

"I believe a more important question would be, how he knew to come here now." Giles said, with a hint of Ripper glinting in his eyes.

"Did you know he would die? Did you set up my boy to be killed?" Angel bellowed.

"Whoa, let's all calm down. I didn't set up your boy, nor did I know he would die tonight. I have an…..acquaintance, who is a seer. She sent me here to find a new immortal. Frankly, I thought whoever she sent me to find, had already met their first death. I had no idea that first death would come tonight." Adam explained hastily.

"Why don't you sing me a few words, and I'll know if you are telling the truth." Lorne said, more than a little angry at the thought that this all could have been prevented.

"I really don't think that would be a good idea, not because I'm lying, but, because I really am not keen on opening up my whole history to you. It could be a bit overwhelming for you." Adam said.

"He's not lying, his aura never changed." Tara offered hesitantly. "But, his aura, it, he's, well, he's really, really, really old."

"That I am." Adam admitted.

"So, what, you're just going to help, out of the kindness of your heart?" Faith said with a sneer.

Adam quickly assessed the situation and turned to face the person he knew would probably understand most, "Xander, if the scariest, strongest woman you know told you to go help someone, on threat of the kind of torture Angelus would have gotten queasy at, what would you do?"

Xander looked at Adam intently. "The scariest woman you know?"

"Absolutely." Adam said without hesitation.

"I would nod, say thank you for my orders and hightail my butt to my destination." Xander said with utter seriousness. "Hey, I deal with some pretty damn scary women everyday. I'm no dummy."

"Hey!" Was chorused by most of the females in the room, while the men nodded their understanding and agreement.

"Who's the scariest?" Anya asked, at the same time Dawn said hopefully, "Am I scary, too?"


	5. Chapter 4 Scary Women

Title: **White Knight, White Light, Part 4 – Scary Women**

Author: Xanfan

Rating: R/NC-17 for violence

Pairing: Xander/Angel

Summary: Slash Xander means more to the Scoobys than they could possible imagine, and when something happens to him, chaos ensues. Crossover with Highlander.

Spoilers: Anything in Ats & BtVS is up for grabs, but I have messed with the timeline a bit.

Warnings: CHARCTER DEATH and Violence and slash.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Words in _Italics_ indicate thoughts.

Last time:

Adam quickly assessed the situation and turned to face the person he knew would probably understand most, "Xander, if the scariest, strongest woman you know told you to go help someone, on threat of the kind of torture Angelus would have gotten queasy at, what would you do?"

Xander looked at Adam intently. "The scariest woman you know?"

"Absolutely." Adam said, without hesitation.

"I would nod, say thank you for my orders and hightail my butt to my destination." Xander said, with utter seriousness. "Hey, I deal with some pretty damn scary women everyday. I'm no dummy."

"Hey!" Was chorused by most of the females in the room, while the men nodded their understanding and agreement.

"Who's the scariest?" Anya asked, at the same time Dawn asked hopefully, "Am I scary, too?"

This Time:

Xander looked over all of the women, gauging their reactions.

"Dawn, you are a teenage girl, there are few things in life scarier than that." Xander replied.

"Anya, you know so many ways to emasculate a man, it is not even funny." Xander said to her.

Xander hesitated, not sure if it was one of those, 'does this outfit make me look fat' questions, but, he answered anyway, "But, I would have to say, the scariest woman in this room is…..Cordelia."

All of the women shouted at once, except for Cordy, who was not sure if she should be offended or proud. She chose proud, and started preening.

All of the men in the room, while in disbelief that Xander had actually answered that question, all thought for a moment, then nodded their heads in agreement.

The ladies eventually stopped shouting, the noise level eventually coming back to normal.

"Why is she the scariest?" Buffy asked huffily, she was the freakin' slayer for Gods sake, why wasn't she the scariest.

"Yeah, why her?" Faith asked, her thoughts going along the same line as Buffy's.

The other women nodded their agreement, except for Tara, who hid a smirk, by bowing her head, so her hair would fall over her face.

"Cordy doesn't have superstrength or demonic powers or magic. Cordy doesn't need it, she can rip you to shreds with just her tongue. Also, she's way inventive and took an online college course that discussed torture techniques throughout the ages, for fun. And to help her think up new threats. You cannot tell me that doesn't make for one scary ass woman." Xander explained.

The whole room froze; worried that Cordy would be offended. The other women all silently agreed with Xander, the men had no need, they already had agreed with him.

"Xander, you didn't mention that I got an 'A' in that class and that I already used some of the threats on Angel and he paled, or got even paler." Cordy said with a proud smile, not in the least offended by the truth.

"So, is your seer as scary as our seer?" Xander asked Adam.

"Well, it might be a tie; of course, mine has seen most of those torture techniques first hand, if not participated. But, she is not as verbally profound. Also, I try not to call her 'my seer', that would just piss her off." Adam replied with a smirk.

Everyone in the room took a moment to digest this piece of information. That must be one scary woman.

"I take it she is an immortal as well?" Giles asked.

"Yes." Adam said simply.

"So why do you need to train the whelp?" Spike asked, despite himself.

"Well, the term immortal is a bit of a misnomer, we can be killed. The only way to really kill us, is to take off our heads. Some believe, that in the end of times, there will be only one immortal left and that person will have such awesome power that they will rule the world. This leads to the Game."

"The Game?" Willow asked.

"Some immortals hunt others to take their heads, so they will be the last one standing. Sometimes, they just do it because they can. When we die permanently, all our knowledge is passed on to the closest immortal, usually, that is the person who took your head. This knowledge is called the quickening. Xander could feel my quickening when I entered the room. It is a kind of an early warning system that makes it so that no immortal can sneak up on you and take your head."

"All that knowledge, passed from person to person, no wonder the last one would be so powerful." Wesley said in awe.

"Yes, well. I am here to train Xander to keep his head."

"You're here to teach me to kill others." Xander said

"If you don't fight back, you will die. In addition to the sword fighting, I'll try to teach you how to survive in other ways. I myself, have survived for a very long time, by not being a target. But, you must be prepared to fight to survive." Adam answered fiercely. "Your friends and your vampire will not always be around to protect you. You must be prepared to do what needs to be done. You and your friends need to realize that. Because, just as you are a target by your association with the Slayer and the vampire with a soul, they will be targets by their association with you. And before you vow to leave them behind, let me tell you, it won't help. If you stayed away from them, or anyone, for the rest of your life, they would still be a target. Better to be with them now and help protect them and the world, than leave them alone to die anyway."

Angel looked at His Boy sadly. Xander would gladly kill or be killed for one of his own, the people he considered family. _Would he be able to fight if his own life was the only one at stake?_


	6. Chapter 5 Remembrance

Title: **White Knight, White Light, Part 5 - Remembrance**

Author: Xanfan

Rating: R/NC-17 for violence

Pairing: Xander/Angel

Summary: Slash Xander means more to the Scoobys than they could possible imagine, and when something happens to him, chaos ensues. Crossover with Highlander.

Spoilers: Anything in Ats & BtVS is up for grabs, but I have messed with the timeline a bit. Yes, I have tweaked the timeline a bit to suit my own purpose, so there.

Warnings: CHARCTER DEATH and Violence and slash.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Words in _Italics_ indicate thoughts.

Last time:

Angel looked at His Boy sadly. Xander would gladly kill or be killed for one of his own, the people he considered family. _Would he be able to fight if his own life was the only one at stake?_

Angel had cleared the room, saying that Xander had a lot to consider and needed to rest after the whole being dead thing.

It was true.

Xander lay back on the bed, secure in His Angel's arms, starring at the ceiling.

He thought back to how he got here, not the whole dying/immortal thing, but the lying in Angel's arms part.

He and Anya had broken up not long after Buffy had been brought back from the dead. He had realized, that as much as he loved Anya, he wasn't really ready to marry her. Anya had taken that to mean that he didn't want to be with her at all, so they had parted ways. They had eventually worked out a friendship, so that was all good. He could only imagine how awful things would have been, had he waited to figure out that he wasn't ready to get married, like, on his wedding day. That was just too horrific to think about.

When they had realized that Buffy had been ripped from Heaven instead of rescued from a hell dimension, Xander had been devastated. He had not wanted to do the spell in the first place, since they weren't sure where Buffy was, but Willow had assured him that Buffy was in hell and that everything would be okay. But, everything was so far from okay, that it wasn't even funny. And Willow was using magic way too much, and for some not so nice reasons. The truth had come out about Willow using magic to mess with their memories, about the same time that he was offered a promotion at work. A promotion that would take him to L.A. Before, he wouldn't even have considered it, but, he really didn't think he could be around Willow right then, so he had said yes.

He had assured Buffy that he loved her and would always be there for her, but, that he needed to be not there, for awhile. She had made him swear to look up Angel if he needed anything or attracted any kind of trouble.

One of the first things he had done, after moving to L.A., was to look up Cordy. They had developed a long distance friendship after she left Sunnydale. He had missed that, the friendship, and almost brutal honesty, was what he missed most about their relationship and he was glad that he could get that part back.

Cordelia had made him promise not to go out on any dates until it was verified that the woman was not a demon, an ex-demon, or just plain evil. Apparently, his demon magnet tendencies had been relayed to the ex-cheerleader.

Xander had also been able to repair his relationships with the Sunnydale crew. Over e-mail, phone calls and frequent visits, he had been able to regain the closeness they had lost over time. Being physically apart from them had allowed him a little perspective on Willow and her behavior, and he had urged the others to intervene earlier than they probably would have on their own and Willow had gotten help in learning to control her magic, instead of letting it control her. Xander couldn't help but feel that disaster had somehow been avoided there.

He and Cordelia hung out a little, but their schedules usually conflicted, what with his daytime work and her nighttime evil fighting. He soon discovered that if he wanted to see his friend, he had to enter the belly of the beast, i.e. Angel Investigations.

Xander had been hesitant about seeing Angel again. He knew he had been less than welcoming to the vampire back in Sunnydale and expected the same kind of reaction to his own arrival in L.A. But, Angel had surprised him, Angel had been, if not exactly welcoming, at least not antagonistic towards him. So Xander reacted in kind and they had developed a non-hostile acquaintanceship.

When Xander had volunteered to help out with the demon fighting, Angel had insisted on giving him some actual training, since he had never gotten any before. He had joined Cordy for her training sessions with Angel and really learned a lot. Even Angel said he was 'not bad', which Xander took as high praise.

Over the months that followed, Xander and Angel realized that, with Buffy not a part of the equation, they actually didn't hate each other, and might actually like each other.

Angel never would have admitted it, but, Xander made him laugh. Angel himself, had a dark sense of humor that he rarely showed. Xander's presence loosened him up enough to let it out and Xander found that Angel could make him laugh, too.

So they became friends, bonding over sucky parents, bad choices in women, weird senses of humor, and demon fighting.

A couple of months into their friendship, Angel had been rewarded by the Powers That Be, they bound his soul. No more happiness raving lunatic vampire. Angelus was still there, but, he wasn't in control and he wasn't going to be anytime soon, or ever. The soul was large and in charge, literally.

When faced with the loss of his forced celibacy, everyone had assumed that Angel would make tracks to Sunnydale, to Buffy. But, he didn't. He surprised them all, by saying that that part of his life was over and that while he would always care for the blonde slayer, he wasn't in love with her. The "Fang Gang" had watched Angel in anticipation of finding out who would be the object of the vampire's affections.

Xander was surprised when Angel took him aside one day and said that, much to Angel's own shock, that when he first found out about his bound soul, his first thoughts had been of Xander.

Xander had stared at him in shock. He had always been a little attracted to Angel, which he had covered with biting comments and resentment, back in Sunnydale. He had never considered that Angel would ever like him back, that way.

Xander had taken a few days to think on the whole situation. He later went to Angel and told him that he didn't want to be in a relationship based on sex. That if Angel didn't think of him in squishy emotion terms, than he was going to pass. But, if Angel could maybe, someday, love Xander, then okay.

Angel had grabbed him and kissed him. Long and hard. When the kiss ended, Angel assured him that his feelings were squishy love feelings and that he wanted Xander forever, not short term.

They hadn't jumped right into bed, despite Angel's previous celibacy. They had actually dated and all that crap, before they had slept together.

Of course, when they did sleep together the first time, they didn't get out of bed, except for necessities, for days.

It was not happily ever after from there. They fought, they screamed, they pouted, but, they also laughed, made up and loved each other.

Telling the Sunnydale crew had been put off as long as possible, no one wanting to see what Buffy's reaction would be. But, when they finally found out, Buffy had surprised them all. She was a little hurt, but, she didn't seem all that surprised. She told them that she had always thought they had a lot in common, they just never took the time to find out. She also said that while Xander's demon magnet status did apparently translate to guys too, she was glad that this one had a soul and hadn't tried to kill him, recently. Xander had tried to be offended, but, was frankly, so glad that Buffy hadn't killed them, he couldn't be upset.

So here they were. They had come up to Sunnydale, not to fight evil, even though they had, they came to Sunnydale to visit Dawn on her birthday, bringing the whole crew, so both teams could meet and bond.

And Xander had ended up dead. Then, he got better.

Now he had to learn how to chop off people's heads, so they wouldn't chop off his.

Xander let himself drift off to sleep in his love's arms, sure that Angel would watch over him while he slept. Thankful that, if nothing else, they still had tomorrow.


	7. Chapter 6 Explanations

Title: **White Knight, White Light, Part 6 - Explanations**

Author: Xanfan

Rating: R/NC-17 for violence

Pairing: Xander/Angel

Summary: Slash Xander means more to the Scoobys than they could possible imagine, and when something happens to him, chaos ensues. Crossover with Highlander.

Spoilers: Anything in Ats & BtVS is up for grabs, but I have messed with the timeline a bit. I have tweaked the timeline a bit to suit my own purpose, so there.

Warnings: CHARCTER DEATH and Violence and slash.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Words in _Italics_ indicate thoughts.

While Xander "rested" and contemplated his future, the others were downstairs, draped over various furniture and trying not to stare at the new guy, while avoiding eye contact with each other. They were all a little taken aback by the night's events, not just Xander dying and then not dying, but also with their own actions.

"So, what you guys did out there tonight, that was pretty impressive, scary, but, impressive. Reminds me of my misspent youth." Adam said, unable to leave well enough alone. He couldn't explain to himself why he felt the need to stir up the group, but he did.

"What do you mean?" Dawn asked.

"They told you about closing the hellmouth?" Adam continued when Dawn nodded, "Did they tell you about the utter destruction that preceded that?"

Dawn and Lorne and Fred turned to stare at their friends and family.

"We gave evil a beat down, nothin' to it." Gunn said.

"Yeah, cause you guys coming back covered in blood and other various demon goo, really screams, nothin' to it." Fred said.

"We were understandably upset, and we had no way of knowing that Xander would revive. We….vented our anger on the demon population." Wesley said, in his proper British way, trying to pretend that he didn't have smears of said 'goo' covering him from head to toe. "In fact, we have no way of knowing if Xander would have come back had Tara not… done what she did."

"How exactly did this evening's events remind you of your misspent youth?" Giles asked, deflecting the conversation back on the immortal. He had never been accused of being stupid.

"Well, in my early days, my companions and I had a right time of it, ruling the known world, leaving destruction in our wake. We were an apocalypse waiting to happen." Adam said, with forced relish.

"Ruling the known world?" Anya asked, impressed.

"Exactly how far back are we talking, mate?" Spike asked.

"How old are you?" Faith asked.

"He's old, very, very, very old. My guess would be thousands of years old." Tara said quietly.

Adam was taken aback. He didn't see a way out of this without revealing who he really was. They were fairly good at keeping secrets themselves. But, could he trust these people? Especially the watchers? Would they report back to their own council, his identity?

"If I tell you how old I am, it doesn't leave this room." Adam said, his tone leaving no room for argument.

The group chorused their agreement.

Adam knew that telling them the truth would go a long way in either gaining their trust or earning their disgust.

"I'm over 5,000 years old. I'm not sure the exact age, they weren't much for record keeping back then."

"Good Lord."

"Oh my."

"Wow."

"Crap, that's old."

"Shite."

"Shit."

"Oh, My Lord. You are him aren't you?" Wesley asked.

"Him?" Several of the group asked.

"Methos, the oldest known immortal. Rumor has it that you are just a myth." Giles supplied, in awe.

"Well, I sort of encouraged those rumors, if not originated them. If no one believes you really exist, they aren't going to be shopping around for your head." Adam/Methos admitted, not really surprised that the watchers knew of him.

"Your Death!" Anya exclaimed.

"Huh?" came from several corners of the room.

"One of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. They terrorized the known world, starting wars, raping, pillaging there way across the continent." Wesley supplied.

Several of the room occupants grabbed weapons.

"I haven't done that in a very long time. It is not a time in my life that I recall with real fondness. It is the past, quite literally, ancient history. It is not who I am now, nor will ever be again. I am not used to revealing this much of myself to anyone, much less a group of strangers. I only do, to stress to you that I am more than capable of training and helping to protect your friend." Methos said gravely.

The room grew quiet, not sure if they should trust this man or slay him for the evil acts he committed. Surprisingly, even to himself, it was Spike who spoke up in Methos' favor.

"Well, it's not like some of the people in this room aren't trying to out grow a past they aren't proud of. And it's not like you lot haven't forgiven worse, more recent acts." Spike said.

"You'll teach him? Not just to kill, but to survive?" Buffy asked. "I mean, if most people believe you're a myth, you must be pretty good at lying low, right. Teach him that. Don't make him a killer, make him a survivor. Make him a really, really, really old guy."

"He'll still need to know how to fight in the Game, play by the rules. Just to keep his head." Adam said.

"What exactly are these rules? Xander's never been one for following rules and abiding by ancient prophecies." Willow said.

This caused the group to chuckle, with shared and private memories of Xander's various thwartings of ancient writings and rules.

"Well, you have to know the rules before you can break them, don't you? Plus, there are some that you can't break, the consequences for doing so are…unpleasant." Methos gave a slight shudder at that. This caused pretty much everyone else present to shudder themselves; after all, what the hell scares Death?

"Like what?" Fred asked, hesitantly.

"Well, there is the no fighting on Holy Ground rule. Then there is the….."

The group listened intently, as Methos proceeded to explain the rules of the Game, as best he knew them. Every one of them wanted to know as much as they could, to help their Xander in any way they could.


	8. Chapter 7 Back to LA

Title: **White Knight, White Light, Part 7 – Back to L.A.**

Author: Xanfan

Rating: R/NC-17 for violence

Pairing: Xander/Angel

Summary: Slash Xander means more to the Scoobys than they could possible imagine, and when something happens to him, chaos ensues. Crossover with Highlander.

Spoilers: Anything in Ats & BtVS is up for grabs, but I have messed with the timeline a bit. I have tweaked the timeline a bit to suit my own purpose, so there.

Warnings: CHARCTER DEATH and Violence and slash.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Words in _Italics_ indicate thoughts.

They had decided that Xander would be more comfortable training at home, so they were heading for L.A., at nightfall.

The Sunnydale crew was deciding what they were going to do, now that the hellmouth was closed. Buffy was still the slayer and there was another hellmouth in Cleveland. Nothing was decided yet, so they were staying put, for the moment.

Xander was saying his goodbyes and receiving bone crushing hugs in return.

"I'll miss you Xan. Be careful." Tara said in his ear, as she gave him a surprisingly strong hug.

"I will."

"Come visit me?" Dawn asked, with her hug.

"Of course, Dawnpatrol."

"Stay safe." Anya said shortly, trying not to sniffle with her hug.

"I'll try."

"Take care of yourself, son." Giles said gruffly, with his manly half hand-shake half-hug.

"I'll do my best."

"Don't get dead…again." Buffy said firmly, nearly cracking a rib with her hug, but, whatever, it would heal pretty quick.

"Take care of yourself whelp; I don't want to have to pick up the pieces of Peaches o'er there if something happens to you." Spike said, and then ruined his nonchalant façade by grabbing the boy and lifting him off the ground in a firm, bone brunching hug.

"At least I didn't run you out of town this time." Willow said, with a sad smile.

"You didn't run me out the first time, Wills."

"I know, it's just, you're my Xander; I'll always want you to be near."

"And you're my Wills, and no matter how far away I am, if you need me, nothing would keep me away." Xander said softly, hugging his oldest friend, tight to his chest.

"And like Buffy said, don't go getting dead again. I can't go through that again." Willow said, against his shoulder.

They squeezed one more time and stepped back from each other.

Willow turned to Angel, "Take care of him?"

"Always." Angel vowed, earnestly.

"I don't need to reiterate the shovel speech?"

"NO! I mean, no, I remember it." Angel inwardly shivered at the first time she had given him the speech for Xander, ten times worse than the one for Buffy. Willow had been very descriptive and creative with just how she would use the shovel, should he hurt Xander.

Willow turned to Adam/Methos, "I usually only give the shovel speech to love interests, but in your case, I'll make an exception. You let Xander get hurt and there is no place on this earth you can hide, and shovels can decapitate just as well as swords, if a bit messier. But, don't think your head will be the first thing I remove. Vague disclaimers are nobodies' friend." Willow said, with utter seriousness and menace. She was backed up by nods from Buffy and Dawn, and Tara's eyes turned white when she nodded. Adam was thoroughly impressed and frightened at the same time, he nodded his understanding.

Spike grunted his approval at the threat, he had taught Red well with the threats.

Giles tsked at the threat, but Ripper shown through, with approval in his eyes.

The L.A. crew was similarly impressed with the threat and backed it up with nods, even though they would be on hand to make sure Xander was okay.

"Well, I can say this visit had been thoroughly enlightening, if not more than a little traumatic. However, I am glad to have met all the people that Xander has gone on and on and on about." Lorne said.

"What he said." Gunn said.

"I had a really nice time, aside from the death thing. I hope to see you all again real soon. And Dawn, I hope your next birthday party isn't nearly as eventful as this one." Fred chimed in.

"Thanks, I think I'll forget the party next year and just ask for a big, expensive present instead." Dawn said with a smile.

"I myself vote we stop celebrating birthdays, period. They haven't gone too well for any of us." Xander said.

The ones who remembered horrible birthdays past, nodded in agreement. The others shuddered to think of the birthday celebrations this group must have had.

"We still get presents, though, right?" Buffy asked.

"Presents, yes. Parties, no." Willow said.

They all chuckled a little, still stunned by the recent events and memories of birthdays past.

"Well, we better get going. Call if you need anything." Angel said.

"Hell, just call, no reason needed." Xander said.

The girls gathered him in a group hug and they all watched sadly, as he got in the car. After the watching Xander die and then undie, they had all wanted to spend a little more time with him, but, they knew that right now, training was the most important thing for him.

More than one cheek was wet with tears as the L.A. crew pulled away, Xander waving until he couldn't be seen, even by supernatural eyes.


	9. Chapter 8 LA Times

Title: **White Knight, White Light, Part 8 – L.A. Times**

Author: Xanfan

Rating: R/NC-17 for violence

Pairing: Xander/Angel

Summary: Slash Xander means more to the Scoobys than they could possible imagine, and when something happens to him, chaos ensues. Crossover with Highlander.

Spoilers: Anything in Ats & BtVS is up for grabs, but I have messed with the timeline a bit. I have tweaked the timeline a bit to suit my own purpose, so there.

Warnings: CHARCTER DEATH and Violence and slash.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Words in _Italics_ indicate thoughts.

The time passed quickly once they got home to L.A. Before this whole thing happened, Angel had been training Xander, not only to fight hand to hand, but also with various weapons, including some basic sword techniques. So Xander had some knowledge going into his training with Adam.

He still got his butt kicked daily, but Adam said he was making good progress and doing really well.

The first week they were home, Xander received about five phone calls a day from Sunnydale, "just to check in" with him. Angel and Adam put a stop to it, limiting the phone calls to one per person per week, unless there was an emergency, saying all the phone calls were interrupting Xander's training. They didn't limit emails, so he still had an inbox full of email everyday, which he was glad to have.

The L.A. crew themselves kept a pretty close eye on him. He often had an audience for his training sessions and the group had gotten downright touchy feely with him, he was always getting hugged or patted on the back or, in Angel's case, kissed breathless.

Xander became more skilled as time passed, even being able to knock Adam on his ass a couple of times. Adam's friends Duncan and Amanda each came for a visit and to help train Xander and get him used to fighting people with different styles and skills.

So Xander improved and the groups, both in L.A. and Sunnydale, grew closer and stronger.

Then Xander had his first challenge. Five months after his first death, a headhunter came to town. Xander's skill level was such that Adam had declared him fit and could no longer offer him the protection of a teacher (meaning fighting in his stead). And even if he could have, Xander wouldn't have let him.

The headhunter was pretty cocky, thinking that this new immortal's head would be easy to take. He was wrong. Xander was used to fighting true masters of the art of sword play as well as supernatural creatures many times stronger than himself, so one headhunter with only a couple of hundreds of years under his belt was not that much of challenge.

Not that it wasn't a decent fight, but five minutes in, the headhunter knew he had vastly underestimated his opponent. Unfortunately for him, he only had a minute to regret his mistake, as six minutes into the fight his head departed his shoulders and he was no more.

Xander first quickening was brutal and painful, his body unused to the feeling of having another's essence thrust into his brain.

But Xander was also used to having things possess his body, or at least try, so he was able to deal with the other man's memories and personality much better than Adam had ever seen. Adam himself usually took longer to deal with the backlash of a quickening than Xander had.

Xander arrived back at the hotel quiet. He nodded to the small group gathered in the lobby waiting for his return and silently walked past them to his and Angel's room, then stripped out of his clothes and climbed into the shower. _I took a man's life._ He then proceeded to collapse to the floor of the shower, wrap his arms around his knees and cry like his heart was breaking. Which it was.

Angel had followed Xander up to their room. He had started to give his boy some space, but when he heard the sobs Xander couldn't hide, he quickly went into the bathroom. Angel pulled off his clothing and stepped into the shower with his sweet boy and held him while he cried. Angel couldn't stop his own tears from falling.

He had no words of comfort, he could just hold Xander and let him cry. When Xander's sobs quieted, Angel used one finger to tilt the boy's face up to his. He placed a kiss on Xander's lips and said the only words that came to mind, "I love you."

Xander kissed Angel back and said, "I just killed a man."

"I've killed hundreds, if not thousands, of men, women, and children." Angel said softly.

"But you're working to redeem yourself."

"So work with me. Not that I think you have anything to redeem yourself for, but if it will make you feel better, we can work for redemption together." Angel said.

"I killed him just to save my own skin." Xander said, tears still streaking his cheeks and combining with the water that was flowing over them.

"You killed him to save me, because I can't lose you again. Those hours that you were dead were the lowest point in my existence, worse than a couple of hundred years in hell or the minutes after I got my soul back when I remembered everything Angelus had done. If he had killed you, I would have hunted him down and tortured him for days, then killed him, let him revive and started the process over again. It could have taken years for me to grow bored and finally rip his head from his shoulders. Do you think I would have a chance at redemption after that? What you did was a mercy killing. It's not like you are going to go out and look for heads to take like he did. You have said you'll only answer challenges or fight in your own defense. He was a monster looking for power, not a man fighting for his own life." Angel said.

Xander just looked at him for a few moments, then broke into giggles.

Angel stared at his boy, unsure if he had gone over the edge or if his sick sense of humor had just kicked in.

Between gasps and fits of giggles, Xander finally managed to speak, "O-o-only…you…could…make…cutting…off… a guy's….head…into…a mercy….killing."

Angel started to chuckle. Soon the two of them were clinging to each other in mirth instead of sadness and desperation.

They settled down and finished their shower. They dried off and crawled into bed, settling down with Angel spooned behind Xander, wrapping his arms around his boy.

Angel fell asleep before Xander. Despite the young immortal's exhaustion, his mind could not help but replay the evening's events over and over again.

He had killed a man, and no matter what Angel said, it was still wrong.

Eventually, Xander settled into sleep and the last thought he had before his mind gave in to the sweet call of sleep was, _At least we still have tomorrow._


	10. Chapter 9 Brooding

Title: **White Knight, White Light, Part 9 - Brooding**

Author: Xanfan

Rating: R/NC-17 for violence

Pairing: Xander/Angel

Summary: Slash Xander means more to the Scoobys than they could possible imagine, and when something happens to him, chaos ensues. Crossover with Highlander.

Spoilers: Anything in Ats & BtVS is up for grabs, but I have messed with the timeline a bit. I have tweaked the timeline a bit to suit my own purpose, so there.

Warnings: CHARCTER DEATH and Violence and slash.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Words in _Italics_ indicate thoughts.

Adam opened the door to the roof and stepped out; he allowed his eyes to adjust to the sunny California sky for a moment before looking around for his quarry. He saw Xander sitting on the ledge, staring out over the city. He wasn't surprised by the boy's contemplative pose. He had taken his first head last night and had avoided pretty much everyone but Angel since coming back from the challenge.

"I know you're there, you might as well come over here and join me." Xander said.

The ancient immortal went to sit next to his young student.

"So, you decided to take up Angel's second favorite pastime?" Adam said.

"What do you mean?" Xander asked.

"Angel's reputation as a brooder precedes him."

"Oh, I'm not brooding, so much as……brooding." Xander admitted.

Adam smirked at the boy, but didn't comment.

They stayed quiet for awhile, looking out at the city and soaking up the sunshine.

"What's his first favorite pastime?" Xander broke the silence.

"What?"

"You said brooding was his second favorite pastime, what's his first?" Xander asked.

"You." Adam replied with a snicker.

"Huh?" Xander elegantly replied.

"If the past months are any indication, I would say that you are his most favorite thing to do." Adam moved quickly to avoid the elbow that was aimed at his ribs.

After a few chuckles, they both lapsed back into silence.

"I keep telling myself that at least now Angel and I can be together for a really long time." Xander said after several minutes.

Adam nodded, not sure how to respond.

"Before, we talked a little about how I would age and die, and he wouldn't age and would be undead. We agreed that if something happened, he wouldn't turn me. I didn't want to be a demon with a soul, I saw how much it tormented him. I also saw how much it hurt him to know that he was going to watch all the people he cared about die. Whether from old age or from the fight, he was going to lose us all." Xander said.

Again, Adam stayed silent.

"I never wanted to live forever. I never wanted to be the last one left behind when everyone I loved was gone. And now, if I didn't have Angel and his own immortality to hold on to, I don't think I could do this." Xander admitted.

"I spent a many years trying to distance myself from people, from getting to know them and caring about them and their lives, because I knew I would just have to watch them die. This was after my long years as a Death mind you. Then someone got under my skin, wouldn't let me be until I knew her and she knew me. I married her, watched her grow old and die. And I didn't regret it, not the death part, but her life, knowing her. Over time I realized that while watching everyone I know and loved die was….difficult, it was those relationships that saved me. I've lost countless friends, wives, lovers, and drinking buddies over my existence. But it was the loving them that kept me alive and allowed me to retain my humanity." Adam said. "This isn't an existence that we choose, but one that has chosen us. And you have someone to share the future with. It's more than a lot of us get."

Xander contemplated what Adam had said. Yes, he would lose his chosen family to the fight, or old age. But maybe later, there would be more family, more friends; they'd never replace the ones he'd lost, but he could love them none the less.

Watching Xander absorb his words, Adam couldn't help but add, "Just think, you'll still have Spike."

Adam didn't move fast enough to avoid the elbow this time.

After a few minutes of roughhousing, they settled back down to an easy silence.

"I killed a man last night." Xander whispered.

"If it helps, it does get easier." Adam said.

Xander stood and turned towards the door leading back downstairs. He stopped and said without looking back, "What if I don't want it to be easier? What if I never want it to be easy to kill a man in cold blood? What if I never want to watch a man's head roll off his shoulders and be okay with that?"

Adam again was left speechless. He watched as the young man left the roof and stared at the door long after Xander was gone.

_I've hooked myself up with another boy scout. _

_Why do I think I'm going to be learning as much, if not more, from this kid as he has learned from me?_

The End


End file.
